1. Why We’re Not (Only) Doing “Mommy & Me” Yoga
OK everyone, I just bit the bullet and am finally sitting down to record the first episode of Yoga for Mom-Life. I’m your host, Susana Jones, and at the time of this recording, it’s Mother’s Day weekend in the U.S., and I hope it’s a happy one for you and your family.
So, as some of you know, I’m the Mom of a 3.5 year-old boy, and I teach Yoga for Mom-Life online. I’m building my company, Shakti Urbana as a graduate school project while pursuing a Master’s degree in Integral Health. I’ve taught Yoga in San Diego for 15 years, and since having a child, I’ve been on a personal and scholarly quest to improve the well-being of Moms.
A core tenet of my work is sustainability - of time, energy, and how we interact with Nature. I care a lot about the environment, and chose Yoga as my vocational path because it’s the most resource-efficient way to improve one’s life, and the world around us. Unlike a lot of self-care “stuff” out there (much of which which I love and I use), Yoga only requires being awake in a body, and paying attention, which adds nothing to your local landfill.
When I tell people that I’m building an online Yoga program for Moms, a lot of people say, “Oh, for doing yoga with your kids?”
Now, some of my members do have little ones crawling all over them while they follow my videos. And yes, doing some Yoga while you enjoy quality time with your kids is super valuable and sweet, but I encourage every Mom out there to do some Yoga by themselves. Here’s why:
There’s a saying in Yoga that “where attention goes, energy flows” (Arora, 2019. p. 120). What we focus on, we energize. This is helpful because it explains why we might feel so depleted, and shows us how our own attention can help us get some energy back. Most of the Moms I know pay attention to everyone else’s needs before their own. To some degree, this is necessary, but when all our attention goes to others, our vitality goes with it. And we need that vitality to function and enjoy the life we work so hard for. When we don’t have this, we snap at our kids or partners, we get sick more often, we fall into negative thinking, and ultimately shorten our life spans due to the chronic stress of making it happen every day on limited energy.
I’m sure we’ve all felt a little empty inside at times when Mom-life has really handed it to us. And while some of that goes with the territory of raising a family, I think that we, as Moms, deserve to feel better day-to-day and live a life that gives more than it takes. There’s a sustainability aspect to this, that deals not only with making the most of our resources of time, energy, and attention, but ensuring that we can live long, happy lives.
I hear Moms all the time say, “there’s never enough time in the day.” I wrote my first term paper on Time Pressure Among Mothers with Young Children in 2022, and to no one’s surprise, Moms are some of the most time-pressured people in American society, especially those whose additional work is needed to pay the bills (Rose, 2017), (Johnson, 2001).
Now, before becoming a Mom, a weekend Yoga class would turn into an all-day affair with friends. On days when I needed personal space, I’d go swim in the ocean and read on the beach by myself all afternoon. It was a dreamy existence, for sure, and it was essential to my well-being during the otherwise very hardworking years of my 20s-30s.
Now, the very outings my former adult-self required to stay healthy and sane are way harder, if not impossible, to come by as a Mom because there are more demands on my time than ever before.
These days, I have to have laser-like precision with the time I spend during the day in order to get all the things done. Even a 20 minute workout at home can be a big deal when you’ve got little kids.
So, when you have less time than ever to do your movement practice, make it more impactful by focusing as best you can on your body and breathing for that timeframe, free of distractions. Yes, it is possible!
With someone else caring for your child while you do Yoga, you can “bank” all that vitality. Paying attention to various parts of the body, as we do in Yoga, revitalizes your entire system. You don’t just get a stronger core and less joint pain, you get healthier digestion, better sleep, a more stable mood, and consistent energy throughout the day. So, when you return to family time, you’ve got “money to spend” in the form of love, caring and patience, which we need so much of.
With focused attention on ourselves, we can make Mom-Life look and feel better than it ever has before. Not because we need to prove anything, but because, my God, we deserve to feel as good as we help others feel.
When I spend time with my Son Bodhi, he gets all my care and attention. I don’t like to miss a beat with him when we’re together. Taking time away from him is often logistically difficult, and emotionally tough for both of us. I tell him, “if exercising wasn’t so important for my health, I wouldn’t do it cause I love playing with you the most.”
Doing things away from our kids can make a Mom feel guilty or uneasy. And it’s not a given that there even is someone else there to be with your kids so you can exercise or decompress.
Fortunately, the same vital-boost we get from Yoga we also get from Nature. By breathing fresh air, moving our bodies, and engaging with our senses outdoors, we replenish our life-force. Inside our homes, drinking pure water, eating whole food and engaging in some relaxation also fills us up.
You already know this, but it’s easy to forget the sources of replenishment that are available to us 24/7. When our attention goes to everyone else first, we don’t have much left to refill our cups in healthy ways. That’s why I’m here, and that’s why I’ll be here. It’s Yoga for Mom-Life, and it’s about time.
New episodes land every Tuesday, aka Suzday.
Mamasté and thanks for tuning in.
References
Arora, I. (2019). Yoga: Ancient heritage, tomorrow’s vision. (Chapter 4, p. 120. Focus: Drishti manaha prana). YogSadhna.
Johnson, F. L. (2001). Ideological undercurrents in the semantic notion of “working mothers”. Women and Language, 24(2), 21-27. https://2p20eff44-mp02-y-https-www-proquest-com.proxy.lirn.net/scholarly-journals/ideological-undercurrents-semantic-notion-working/docview/198818260/se-2?accountid=173519
Rose, J. (2017). “Never enough hours in the day”: Employed mothers’ perceptions of time pressure. Aust J Soc Issues, 52, 116-130. https://doi.org/10.1002/ajs4.2
